Articles

Visit with Santa Cold Open – SNL

August 13, 2019


Ok give Santa back from his
lunch break. Up to the North Pole aka Panda
Express. That’s right.
And he’s ready to hear your Christmas wishes for you. What about you.
My little boy. Are you ready to talk to Santa. All right.
We’ll get on up here young man. What’s your name Tyler. And Tyler what would you like
Santa to bring you this year. Could I get a Mega Bloks
dinosaur. Well I think that can be
arranged and can I get a laser tag. Well I can certainly try. And can you tell me what you can do. Hope.
Ok. Wow. Let’s see. I think I can handle the mega
blocks and the laser tag. Can you take the Al Franken
thanks for the bloom. No and in this climate can you
just call me Amy Day. Well time I guess you could say
that Al Franken is on Salmas naughty list this year. What about Roy Moore which this
is here. is here.
It’s not really a list it’s It’s not really a list it’s
more of a registry. Ok you know what.
We should keep this line moving along OK. Good luck. Ok who’s up next. Hi I’m Jessica. Merry Christmas Jessica.
What would you like from Santa. I wanted to follow up on
Tyler’s question is President Trump on the naughty list. Well you know Santa tries to
stay out of political matters our president may have said or
done a few naughty things 19 accusers.
Google it. Ok can we can we just not Amy. Thanks Jessica.
Thanks Jessica. I’m sure we can all learn a
I’m sure we can all learn a lesson from what’s going on in
the news. We sure can. I learned that if you and you
did something wrong you get in trouble. But if you did they let you
keep your job. Oh OK.
What do you do. Ok. Just go.
You might get some coal in your stocking. From where we both know coal is
a dying industry. Ok thank you very much. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Ok.
Hello. Hi Santa.
My name is Billy. I want to football.
Well you got it. I love football. We’re the players need the
national anthem. Did the troops know they’re
just kneeling because they’re tired from other brain injuries. Sure. Let’s just go with that somehow.
That’s the happier version. All right. Let’s go to the hospital. Hi. I asked my dad for any American
girls are interested. You want to know about drugs
you know. Well let me tell you is his tax
cuts. That’s the economic subject.
You know Santa didn’t study economics he studied musical
theater which is why perhaps he’s working as a Santa at this
mall right now. Actually little lady that tax
cut is like Harry Potter. Ok.
Make your health care disappear. Make your health care disappear.
Wow. Wow. Classic little time response.
Yes. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you very much. Well got you.
Q What do you want for Christmas. Santa Ana Barbie and that’s the
time when batteries are going to take that away from me. Ok Barbara you get it later and you know just a reminder to
keep your wishes light and Christmasy and not political.
Ok. All right that’s good. I hate politics. Thank the Lord instead. I want to talk about opioid next to you. What would you like for
Christmas. I’m on NBC. It’s OK. I’m NBC. That’s several Tara Wall. Tell me what you know about Tel
Aviv. Did you say what about you.
Maybe you like a toy from Santa. Oh you mean toy like Matt Lauer
gave to his co-worker.>>EAR MUFFS, EAR MUFFS.
WHERE THE HELL DID THEY GET THESE KIDS FROM?
I NEVER THOUGHT I’D SAY THIS, BUT I THINK OUR PUBLIC SCHOOLS
ARE TOO GOOD. NEXT.
I AM GET AING YOU AN X BOX.>>X BOX?
AWESOME. MORE FACTORY JOBS FOR CHINESE
KIDS.>>OKAY, KIDS.
SANTA MIGHT NEED A BREAK. THIS ONE MIGHT INVOLVE A
CIGARETTE.>>SANTA?
>>YES, LITTLE GIRL WHAT’S YOUR NAME.
>>JENNY. THIS YEAR I DON’T WANT ANY
GIFTS. I JUST WANT EVERYTHING TO BE.
>>OH, MY GOODNESS, JENNY, LISTEN TO HE ME.
I KNOW THAT THINGS SEEM PARTICULARLY INSANE RIGHT NOW.
LIKE TRULY MIND BENDINGLY INSANE, AND WE SEEM SOF LOST ALL
PERSPECTIVE ON WHAT’S NAUGHTY OR NICE.
>>I KNOW. I’VE SEEN FOX NEWS.
>>OH, THERE YOU GO. BUTTED A BAD AS THINGS MIGHT
SEEM, I PROMISE YOU, JENNY, IT WILL BE OKAY.
OKAY? MAYBE NOT TODAY.
MAYBE NOT TOMORROW. MAYBE NOT FOR ANOTHER THREE
YEARS, 42 DAYS AND 24 MINUTES, JENNY, BUT MOST PEOPLE IN
AMERICA ARE GOOD PEOPLE, AND EVENTUALLY GOOD PEOPLE WILL FIX
OUR COUNTRY.>>OKAY.
GOOD. BUT JUST IN CASE, I’M PUTTING
ALL MY MONEY IN BITCOIN.>>OH, YES.
THAT’S THE SPIRIT! NOW DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT SANTA
ALWAYS SAYS?>>YES.
>>DO YOU WANT TO SAY IT WITH ME?
>>OKAY.>>MERRY CHRISTMAS, AND LIVE
FROM NEW YORK, IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT!

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100 Comments

  • Reply chuck wood December 18, 2018 at 6:30 pm

    its because of the baby boomer generation that most everything is fucked for current generations… and they are still on top fucking everything up.

  • Reply Anna Fowdy December 18, 2018 at 9:07 pm

    Do those kids even know what they're talking about?

  • Reply Spot TheDot December 18, 2018 at 9:36 pm

    Iโ€™m in 6th grade and this is a typical conversion for us

  • Reply Drew Kirner December 20, 2018 at 9:03 pm

    2:07 That fist bump killed me XD

  • Reply KWiNK December 21, 2018 at 10:51 pm

    This has got to be some of the best writing I've seen on SNL. Great sketch!

  • Reply Shawn M December 23, 2018 at 12:08 pm

    Megyn Kelly just imploded.

  • Reply B mcc12 December 23, 2018 at 6:40 pm

    The kids suck at acting

  • Reply Devendra Chaure December 24, 2018 at 3:35 am

    Live shows r a challenge to record.. Specially fr children..!!

  • Reply Fuzunga December 24, 2018 at 4:42 am

    โ™ช Shlingin puhn! Shlingin puhn!
    Urshka durshka dugh!
    Leemuhn pugh un leemuhn dugh!
    Dah ishkah mishkah slay! โ™ช

  • Reply Joshua Cook December 25, 2018 at 10:52 pm

    Lol, that bit coin reference. I think cryptocurrencies could be useful, but bitcoin is garbage. Let's hope now that the cryptocurrency bubble popped, bitcoin specifically wont rise again.

  • Reply stranraerwal December 26, 2018 at 7:54 pm

    great, how these kids can read their prompter cards !

  • Reply teddy sincero December 27, 2018 at 5:42 pm

    Yawn

  • Reply PuRe ReD December 28, 2018 at 5:11 pm

    What are they reading itโ€™s so annoying lol

  • Reply Quentin Gilbert December 29, 2018 at 6:17 am

    3:35 is what I think while watching snl

  • Reply Quentin Gilbert December 29, 2018 at 6:28 am

    While some jokes about trump are alright and funny, snl over loads them and makes their views way to obvious, they are losing right wing viewers like me

  • Reply FiveWizzy December 29, 2018 at 8:35 am

    Holy shit why do they have to put political shit like I hate trump so let's all make fun of him can't it just be random stuff and not bashing on every single republican

  • Reply Liv Casper December 29, 2018 at 6:01 pm

    Those kids are very cute

  • Reply cvt cvt December 30, 2018 at 2:54 pm

    This made me love Fox News, Republicans, Conservatives, America, white people, and Trump even more. Thank you, SNL!

  • Reply Crystalle Johnson December 31, 2018 at 5:39 am

    This is amazing, regrouping all America's problems in one skit, good job guys. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚so funny

  • Reply Sapphirewingthefurrycritic December 31, 2018 at 11:45 pm

    You can tell those kids are reading off the cue cards.

  • Reply HC Universal December 31, 2018 at 11:58 pm

    That little girl saying the SNL line is awesome! Sooo cute and smart!

  • Reply Joel Whitson January 3, 2019 at 6:06 am

    I think Kate McKinnon and Kenan Thompson are good SNL cast members, but unfortunately the content of the show doesn't make me laugh anymore. It's just same old same old. Hopefully SNL will bounce back. It's been in a decline for a little while.

  • Reply Nora Hoyle January 6, 2019 at 6:06 pm

    I myself am a serious child actor (it's SO MUCH FUN YOU GUYSSSSS) and I watched until the end of the skit and thought:
    wow. how exciting to be a child actor and be able to say that sacred phrase on national television: and LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!!!
    that looks absolutely amazing

  • Reply MrThomasFan1Forever January 7, 2019 at 11:11 pm

    wat r those kids actors

  • Reply ClintDempsey76 January 10, 2019 at 8:21 pm

    man, the elf is an idiot

  • Reply Aiber Lane January 10, 2019 at 11:09 pm

    So many bad child actors! Cound't they borrow some good ones from Broadway?

  • Reply Mr V January 13, 2019 at 5:46 am

    This๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Is๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Not๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Funny๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Meme review ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป

  • Reply Santiago Ortiz January 16, 2019 at 6:05 pm

    Classic libetart response ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply Tommy White January 20, 2019 at 3:16 am

    "Classic libitard response"

  • Reply Ba Thanh Santiago January 23, 2019 at 11:24 pm

    "WHERE THE HELL DID THESE KIDS COME FROM????"

  • Reply Maria Vitug January 27, 2019 at 5:21 pm

    I noticed that none of the kids were looking at Santa.

  • Reply Andrew Cocchiara February 6, 2019 at 2:04 pm

    The Classic Libertard response one was FIRE๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ”ฅ

  • Reply Emil Boyadzhiev February 6, 2019 at 4:52 pm

    Why is this so cringy isn't supposed to be funny everyone looks uncomfortable the kids look like robots and you kind of suggest that an accusation equals fact

  • Reply Gwen February 11, 2019 at 10:22 pm

    That last kid is having the time of his life

  • Reply Andrew Rout February 12, 2019 at 2:27 am

    Is it just me, or does anyone else wanna smash the elf

  • Reply Exodia Wolfe February 18, 2019 at 9:31 pm

    These kids are the YouTube comment section.

  • Reply Phantom Viper February 19, 2019 at 8:00 pm

    wow, they allowed actual kids to start in this one, that doesn't happen very often,

  • Reply IIIIIawesIIIII February 20, 2019 at 2:37 am

    Cute little girls are sooo cute and pure. Why can't they just die before puberty turns them into witches? ๐Ÿ™

  • Reply Why_Be_Jaded February 25, 2019 at 1:37 pm

    2:48 the subliminal messaging in the subtitles XD
    Also 3:08 Harry Potter pops in
    OMG so much more too XD turn on subs!

    It said "You want to know about drugs you know" if it gets fixed.

    "Actually little lady that tax cut is like Harry Potter"

  • Reply Elvis Johnson February 28, 2019 at 7:18 am

    These kids are smart

  • Reply TheMountainbobcat March 4, 2019 at 5:42 pm

    its happy new year, and live from NY, its getting worse if you can believe it! someone help stone over to the other side, with the rest of the dark angles.

  • Reply Vlogs With John March 6, 2019 at 12:31 am

    Aww Jenny is so cute

  • Reply PianoInFlames March 8, 2019 at 4:03 am

    I love how theyโ€™re all obviously looking at queue cards.

  • Reply sergeant816 March 17, 2019 at 4:08 pm

    Just like the Clinton's

  • Reply sergeant816 March 17, 2019 at 4:10 pm

    If SNL would leave politics out. They'd be funnier

  • Reply Stanislav Zaverukha March 20, 2019 at 12:41 pm

    Just like the Clinton's

  • Reply Bri, Emma, and Kierstin March 24, 2019 at 4:03 pm

    You can tell that theyโ€™re reading off of something๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply Akshay Kumar March 24, 2019 at 5:54 pm

    shameful use of children's

  • Reply Olivia D March 25, 2019 at 8:25 pm

    only good kid actors were the last two

  • Reply RemixWizard March 27, 2019 at 3:08 am

    They definitely looking at a card when they talk

  • Reply macaron3141592653 March 31, 2019 at 8:14 pm

    Hey its holden tewdicks

  • Reply vlex756 April 2, 2019 at 3:35 am

    Kate was deploying her full Dennis Miller delivery in this one! Awesome!

  • Reply Yoakleoakle April 7, 2019 at 4:29 am

    " Santa came here all the way from the north pole aka panda express "

  • Reply Cherry Blossom April 12, 2019 at 8:03 pm

    Is the black girl his kid? I noticed she was the only one that sat on Santas lap.

  • Reply Saeed US April 13, 2019 at 9:35 pm

    4:11 "An [American] embassy that's still in Tel Aviv."

    5:17 "I know [about Insanity and Naughtiness] I've seen Foxnews." :-))

    To that I say..American Children are Destined for Greatness.

  • Reply musicuma811 April 16, 2019 at 3:33 am

    Jenny cracked me up

  • Reply Joseph DaDan April 18, 2019 at 12:47 am

    Those kids must have ben through the internet and news!!!!!

  • Reply MrRouke April 23, 2019 at 10:07 pm

    I completely forgot that SNL is a comedy show and not political bullsh!t.

  • Reply Gaming Junction April 23, 2019 at 11:11 pm

    When you forgot your lines during a presentation and your friend pulls up the word document. (Look at the kid) 0:30

  • Reply Vasco Apolonio April 25, 2019 at 1:38 am

    Congrats !!! You are doing Public Service, SNL

  • Reply Pegasus33 75 April 30, 2019 at 2:41 am

    Lol I think the little girl meant to say CNN instead of Fox News

  • Reply Amelia Hartford May 4, 2019 at 12:58 pm

    โ€œBe careful or you might get coal in your stocking.โ€ โ€œFrom where, we both know coal is a dying industry.โ€

  • Reply Andy Suicide May 7, 2019 at 6:25 am

    This shit sum garbage smh

  • Reply Mo Money May 9, 2019 at 1:28 pm

    Classic libtard response LOL

  • Reply James James May 13, 2019 at 2:53 am

    Are the kids reading off a script

  • Reply ColieDee Kenzo May 13, 2019 at 10:53 am

    This is great!

  • Reply Vanessa Trotter May 14, 2019 at 2:44 am

    Aww! They did so well! These kids actors were great

  • Reply Ryley Kuhn May 14, 2019 at 9:31 pm

    Lol I know they dont know the words, but did you notice how they were talking to SANTA but staring off into space

  • Reply Amy Stabenow May 25, 2019 at 1:05 am

    How can kate be this amazing…..

  • Reply Sloaa May 25, 2019 at 1:52 am

    I hate how this is political smh.

  • Reply Enrique Everything May 28, 2019 at 1:27 am

    How come none of these kids actually look at Santa

  • Reply iBourne xx 1994 May 28, 2019 at 1:32 pm

    Tyler is a shit actor

  • Reply Youtube Android May 30, 2019 at 7:31 pm

    19 accusers, no evidence.

  • Reply Doggy Guy May 31, 2019 at 8:17 pm

    You shouldโ€™ve gave him a PS4

  • Reply Militant Hatred June 3, 2019 at 7:41 am

    Future vacuous actors
    These kids make me sick

  • Reply carly miler June 3, 2019 at 10:08 pm

    "I know, I've seen Fox News"๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply Horcrux Hunter June 4, 2019 at 10:52 pm

    "And I know we've lost sight on what's naughty and what's nice–"
    "I know; I've seen Fox News."

    bury me coz I ' m DEAD

  • Reply Chad Sagot June 5, 2019 at 2:02 am

    Why that nigga black Santa ain't black

  • Reply Christophe Ferreira June 6, 2019 at 10:12 am

    Where do they look at? Are they reading boards or something?

  • Reply Caroline Blair June 7, 2019 at 4:59 am

    i appreciate the kids reading their lines and making no eye contact

  • Reply CallMeOsborne June 8, 2019 at 5:02 am

    Stop hating on Fox News you guys are ass holes

  • Reply Kidus Anteneh June 9, 2019 at 7:17 am

    I bet the little girl lost all her money ha ha ha ha

  • Reply KLJF June 9, 2019 at 7:40 pm

    the internet will bring capitalism to it's knees , then cut it's stinking head off .

  • Reply Simon Holland June 19, 2019 at 10:40 pm

    i know Iโ€™ve seen fox news

  • Reply Diana Dobson June 21, 2019 at 10:21 pm

    KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS. ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿคฉ๐Ÿ˜Šโคโคโคโค

  • Reply M June 24, 2019 at 9:37 pm

    Propaganda is cool when it's slightly funny

  • Reply fucian j June 25, 2019 at 1:33 am

    The Clinton's and Obamas are on Santa's naughty list.

  • Reply Phil Dawson June 25, 2019 at 1:40 am

    Trump derangement syndrome

  • Reply MB June 29, 2019 at 6:35 am

    Where the hell they get these kids from!? ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply PUMPA DOUR June 30, 2019 at 4:22 am

    TRUMP 2020, BaBy;)

  • Reply Edward Cross July 1, 2019 at 1:06 pm

    I feel how santa feels, keep politics out of entertainment.

  • Reply CUPCAKE July 8, 2019 at 3:20 am

    You can tell that the little black girl was reading off a card by the way her face moves

  • Reply Gnome Queen July 14, 2019 at 2:41 am

    Them reading from the que cards lol

  • Reply Ricardo Boi July 20, 2019 at 3:16 am

    Fuck you bitch Donald trump is the best president

  • Reply October August 1, 2019 at 10:18 am

    Lol people find this stuff funny?

  • Reply Super Sonic boi August 8, 2019 at 6:15 am

    I love this video๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply Super Sonic boi August 8, 2019 at 6:15 am

    You kids are dark

  • Reply Super Sonic boi August 8, 2019 at 6:16 am

    How do you know who Donald Trump is why are your parents telling you these things๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Reply Watergate II August 9, 2019 at 4:44 pm

    The kids are such shit actors

  • Reply SARISS80 August 12, 2019 at 6:56 pm

    Why these kids staring bland faced into to space? They must be reading a teleprompter.

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